The Overeducated Grumbler

by Terris Schneider

  For some reason, the winter doesn’t make me grumble as much. Mostly because I am one of those saps that loves Christmas. Winter is also the perfect setting to brood, which surprisingly makes me happy. To make winter even more fun, there is so much great local stuff coming our way in Van. If I wasn’t a poor and starving writer cliché, I would go to every event possible this winter. It seems like everything is coming up at once and I wish I could see all of it. Anyways, here are some of my recommendations for things to see this winter:

DAN DEACON (December 2 • The Rickshaw Theatre)

I’ve heard his shows are mental! And who does not want to see a chubby guy in giant glasses dance around and make us all smile. Plus, his album Bromst blows my mind, and tickets are only 15 bones!

GRAHAM CLARK (December 15–17 • The Comedy Mix)

I’m a comedy snob, I’ll be the first to admit it, and I enjoy Graham Clark’s and Dave Shuma’s Stop Podcasting Yourself program. What I enjoy even more are Clark’s hilarious tweets, which are reason enough to check him out at the Comedy Mix.

DINOSAUR JR (December 18 • The Commodore)

Not only will Dinosaur Jr. be on the road with the kick ass Henry Rollins, who will be interviewing them onstage, but they’ll be playing their classic album Bug in full. Seriously, everyone, that’s the album that had “Freak Scene” on it. It’s an alt-rock staple. Get yer tickets!

TREE LIGHTING EVENT (December 9 • Jack Poole Plaza, Vancouver Convention Centre)

I already admitted to being a Christmas loving dork, so why not feel all warm and fuzzy and check out the Rockefeller Center-style Tree Light Celebration at Jack Poole Plaza. The event is a 50 foot tree lit up in front of the gallery with some Christmas soloists and a special guest appearance by none other than SANTA CLAUSE! Why not have a feel good moment this winter, am I right? And this is coming from me!

  Just so you all don’t go too crazy, I am still my cynical self. I will share with you my least favourite thing about Christmas. Is it eggnog? No, are you crazy? I’m cuckoo for eggnog. The worst thing about Christmas: SHOPPING MALLS.

  My biggest problem when I go out shopping is that the other shoppers are always in la-la land. I do my Christmas shopping two months in advance just so I can avoid this. Yes, I’m neurotic and irritable but come on people, can you please just pay attention to what you’re doing? Everyone is walking at a turtle’s pace and not paying attention, and I just want to knock people down. Yes, children included. You should be looking after them, parents. Sheesh. Anyways, just had to get that off my chest. Happy Holidays, everyone.