Yeah, we get it. You love Pumpkin Spice, wearing sweaters, and all that crap that comes around every autumn, but can we please get to what’s important: it’s almost Halloween and you either finished your costume months ago or you’re waiting until October 30 for inspiration/desperation to reeeeally strike. Regardless of your wardrobe situation, Halloween trumps a lot of the other holidays because you get that supernatural-scare factor that days like Arbour Day just don’t have. To celebrate the spookiness of October, we asked the Discorder staff what musical artist(s) they’d most like to be haunted by.
Elliot Chan || Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti
On Halloween four years ago, I was wandering the streets with my droogs. At some point, a drunkard jay-ran across the street. He threatened to punch each of my friends in the face for knocking over a garbage can. We plead not guilty and the confrontation ended with a boozy, yet emotional handshake. All the while, Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti’s “Menopause Man” was playing through my iPhone speakers in my pocket.
Pyra Draculea || Johnny Thunders
Johnny Thunders is welcome to come haunt me any time he wishes. Based on my iMac desktop photo and the posters on my jamspace walls, some might say he already does. However, I have yet to have any visitations. Let’s see here: I know you leave out milk and cookies to lure Santa, but Thunders would probably want something a little more illegal than milk and cookies.
Erica Leiren || Doris Day
Miss Day is still alive, of course — may she live many more years — but I’m thinking ahead to the future. She’s supernaturally cheerful and was a triple-threat during her long career, initially as a band singer then a movie star and finally hotelier. She had a tough personal life, but persevered cheerfully through all obstacles, which is why I think she’ll make a wonderful ghost. I plan to visit her quaint hotel one day and anticipate that her presence — whether on this astral plane or the next — will pervade the premises with her lifelong fun-loving and kindly spirit.
Luan Li || Art Tatum
I would love to be haunted by the prolific Art Tatum, whose jazz piano imaginations set the standard for jazz pianists for generations. Not only was Tatum outstanding in his technical skills, but he was visionary and futuristic in most of his works. I can live with having his astounding flourishes and improvisations set as the eternal background music to my life.
Mason McIntosh || Jack White
It would have to be Jack White. When I listen to him, I already imagine White carrying a scythe around, waiting for a reason to sneak up on me when I’m in a deep slumber. Also, with all of his dark references to ancient times and grim looking topics, he’s the scariest pale-skinned, dark-haired character that would haunt me sinisterly.
Sam Tudor || Aaron Embry
As someone with a sort of natural wimpiness, I’d probably do my best to avoid the whole haunting situation altogether. However, if there’s no choice then I’m not going to go half-way. Aaron Embry has a voice like the eeriest of ghosts, and his album Tiny Prayers seems like the type of thing that would drift from a window of the abandoned mansion next door. No sleeping would occur.
Max Wainwright || Ginger Baker
Having recently seen Jay Bulger’s incredible documentary, Beware of Mr. Baker, I feel compelled to pick the titular subject. The former Cream and Blind Faith percussionist is absolutely nutso. With his wild-eyed, devilish appearance and capricious temper, Ginger Baker’s bent for fear is only equaled by his fervid drumming. His soul will forever haunt rock ‘n’ roll.